The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast
The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast
Hosted by Danielle Black
A no-fluff, evidence-based podcast for parents navigating post-separation abuse, family violence, coercive control, and high-conflict separation and divorce - with a relentless focus on protecting children in a system that too often fails them.
Hosted by Danielle Black, Australia’s leading specialist in child-focused post-separation parenting, this podcast is not about "amicable co-parenting at all costs", outdated ideologies, or adult notions of fairness. It is about understanding how abuse frequently continues through parenting arrangements after separation - and what genuinely child-centred decision-making looks like when risk, fear, or power imbalance is present.
Each episode challenges the myths that place children in harm’s way, including Australia’s dangerous obsession with 50/50 shared care, the misapplication of "friendly parent" ideals, and the expectation that protective parents should endlessly compromise to keep the peace.
Drawing on developmental science, research-based evidence, trauma-informed practice, and lived experience, Danielle breaks down:
- How post-separation abuse actually operates
- Why many standard parenting frameworks fail children in high-conflict cases
- What evidence-based, defensible, child-focused parenting really requires
- How to move from confusion and self-doubt to clarity and confidence
This podcast is for parents who are done minimising risk, done being gaslit by systems and professionals, and done prioritising adult comfort over children’s safety and development.
Expect direct language, research-backed insight, practical guidance and a few cuss words here and there - not platitudes, false balance, or pressure to accept arrangements that don’t sit right - because children’s wellbeing matters more than adult fairness. Always.
To go deeper, explore The Post-Separation Parenting Blueprint™, Danielle’s flagship program supporting parents to make informed, protective decisions after separation.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au
Keywords: post-separation abuse, family violence, coercive control, high-conflict parenting, separation, divorce, family court, Australian family law.
Episodes
104 episodes
102. Everyone has a biggest problem - Why your pain is valid, why staying stuck is a choice, and what it costs both you and your children
In this episode, Danielle unpacks something that comes up constantly in her work with clients: the tendency to invalidate our own pain by comparing it to someone else's. To stay in situations that are harmful - not because we can't leave, but b...
101. AI tools for protective parents: Claude.ai, ChatGPT and AI Danielle - the 24/7 digital coach inside the Blueprint
What if you had access to a specialist coaching resource trained in coercive control, the Australian family law system, attachment science, and nervous system regulation - any time of day or night, at no additional cost?In this episode, ...
100. The game is the same - 17 Years, 100 Episodes, and the debut of 'Stronger, Braver, Together'
One hundred episodes.In this milestone episode, Danielle Black does something she has never quite done before - she tells the full truth about where this work came from, what it has cost, and why she hasn't walked away.More than s...
99. Why your family lawyer can't do what you actually need - and what only you can do
Your lawyer is not trying to find the truth. And once you understand why - once you really understand how the adversarial legal system is designed and what it is and isn't built to deliver - everything changes.In this episode, P...
98. How I did it - Dating after abuse, self-trust, and deciding you're not too broken
Dating after domestic violence, coercive control, or post-separation abuse is one of the most under-discussed topics in the survivor space. Most people are somewhere between terrified and convinced it's simply not possible for them.In th...
97. Can you find a healthy relationship after abuse? A conversation with my husband - plus the debut of 'Calm is Credible'
Healthy relationships after family violence, and in the midst of post-separation abuse, are possible - but they are rarely talked about honestly in survivor spaces.In this special anniversary episode, Danielle Black is joined by her husb...
96. Family reports are not the verdict: What protective parents must know
Family Reports can be influential pieces of evidence in Australian family court proceedings - but they are widely misunderstood.In this episode, Danielle Black explains what Family Report Writers are actually assessing, why protective pa...
95. The collaboration question: When it works, and when it doesn't
Collaboration is often presented as the gold standard after separation.Parents are encouraged to communicate openly, compromise, and "work together". In the right circumstances, a collaborative approach can indeed produce faster, less ad...
94. The invisible architecture of childhood: What primary caregivers carry - and why it matters
International Women’s Day bonus episodeIn this special episode, Danielle Black explores something rarely named in conversations about parenting after separation: the invisible architecture of childhood.The planning.<...
93. Divorce coaching, narcissism & high-conflict separation: Choosing the right support
What does a divorce coach actually do - and how do you know if the support you’re choosing after separation is right for your situation?In this episode of The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast, principal coach Danielle Black ...
92. Intrusive thoughts & rumination after separation: When coaching and self-management tools are enough - and when you need therapy
Intrusive thoughts. Rumination. The relentless "what if" loops that keep you awake at night.If you’re a protective parent navigating separation, family court, or post-separation abuse, you are not broken - your brain is responding to chr...
91. Stronger, Braver Together: How safe, professionally held, group spaces change post-separation parenting
In this episode, Principal Coach Danielle Black is joined by Senior Coaches Brigid Morgan and Trudie Hargrave to explore what meaningful, professionally held group support actually looks like in post-separation parenting work.Many parent...
90. Put on your own cape: Rewiring survival patterns, reclaiming worthiness & STEERing your future after separation
If you’ve experienced high-conflict separation, coercive control, other forms of family violence or post-separation abuse, your brain has adapted to help you survive. But survival wiring can make advocacy, decision-making, and communication ins...
89. Meet Senior Coach Brigid Morgan: Protective parenting and post-separation empowerment in Australia
In this episode, Danielle is joined by Senior Coach Brigid Morgan for a warm, honest conversation about post-separation recovery, protective parenting, and why evidence-based, child-focused support matters.We start with a light-he...
88. Considering separation? Let’s talk about the choice you’re already making
Considering Separation in 2026? Let’s Talk About the Decision You’re Already MakingIf you’re listening to this episode, chances are the question isn’t “Should I leave?”It’s “Why am I still here - and what is this ...
87. Welcome to 2026: What protective parents need to know (and utilise) this year
2025 was a big year - for families navigating separation, and for the work we do here at Danielle Black Coaching.In this episode, I’m welcoming you into 2026 by reflecting on what we learned in 2025, what’s coming next, and - most...
86. Information vs Integration - Why consuming content isn’t the same as becoming strategic
It’s easy to listen to podcasts, read posts on socials, and consume information… but none of that automatically turns you into the credible, strategic, protective parent you need to be in a post-separation, coercive-control landscape.
85. Why being strategic, and well-informed, saves you money in the long run
Most parents assume that family law is financially exhausting because lawyers and court processes are inherently expensive. But that's not the full story.Legal fees explode when parents approach their matter reactively instead ...
84. How likely is equal shared parenting time & decision-making?
Is 50/50 shared care or equal shared parental responsibility (decision making) automatic in Australia? No - but it is highly likely if protective parents consent to it out of exhaustion.This episode breaks down the biggest myth in...
83. To the parents who have invested in themselves - this episode is for you
This episode is a heartfelt message to the parents who have joined The Post-Separation Parenting Blueprint™ or invested in coaching - parents who have chosen courage over comfort, strategy over survival, and capacity over chaos.Da...
82. When programs, certificates and parenting orders don't equal safety
Do Final Orders mean you're finally safe? Does completing a behaviour change program guarantee transformation? This episode exposes the dangerous myths that leave children unprotected.If you've been told "he's done the program, so thing...
81. Stop googling 'narcissists' - What Australian protective parents REALLY need to understand
If you’ve ever found yourself deep in Google searches trying to work out whether your ex is a covert narcissist, a malignant narcissist, or something in between… this episode is for you.Because here’s the truth:Understanding “narc...
80. Understanding coercive control (Part 2): The 7 patterns directed at children
If Part 1 helped you understand the patterned aspect of coercive control, this episode helps you finally see the harm.In Part 2 of this series, Danielle Black breaks down the 7 child-directed patterns...
79. Understanding coercive control (Part 1): Why most professionals miss it
Why do family lawyers, mediators, report writers and even judges keep missing what might be painfully obvious to you - that this isn’t “high conflict,” it’s coercive control? And why does that mislabel put your children in danger?...
78: Lead, don’t follow: Evidence over ideology in post-separation parenting
Most protective parents assume their lawyer or mediator understands what their children truly need after separation - developmentally, emotionally, and in terms of safety.But the uncomfortable truth is this: lawyers know the law, not chi...
